Until about a month ago, I didn't know handing out free chapters was a thing that authors did, but honestly, it's a great idea. The first chapters are the most important ones in the whole book, they determine whether or not the reader keeps going. They're the hook, the trap, that pulls readers into the story, or they're the reason why the reader puts the book down.
TL;DR first chapters are really important.
I grabbed a couple sample chapters at a local author event last month and figured "hey, I could judge these chapters and talk about whether or not I'd keep reading." Thus, the first chapter gauntlet was born. Here we go.
One of the samples I nabbed was Hope(less) by Melissa Haag (who I got to talk to at Author Daze and is really nice). The sample I got contained the first four chapters of the book, but I focused on the very first one. That was plenty, though, a LOT happens right off the bat.
We are introduced to a girl who has the power to sense everyone around her, which she describes as being like a "human fish finder." She is walking through a park on the way home from school when she notices someone different. Usually, she can see others around her as greenish-yellow flames, but this guy is...blue? She follows him to a nearby pond, where he turns into a werewolf and chases her around a bit.
Naturally, once this tag game is finished, the girl (who we learn is called Gabby Winters) and the werewolf (who is called Sam) become friends. They meet up every week so that Sam can teach Gabby about the werewolf/magic world, and eventually, Sam even gets to meet the rest of the fam. There we learn that Gabby's foster parents are having a baby and that when the baby is born Gabby will have to be sent away (because those are the foster parent rules I guess). Sam conveniently offers a place for her to stay where she will be able to meet more people in the magic world.
Yeah, it's a lot. But honestly, it's not enough to make me keep reading.
The biggest problem I have with the story so far is that I haven't been given a reason to care about any of the characters. We know Gabby and Sam's names, but that's about it. I don't know what she likes, what she wants, or what her goals are. We don't know what she likes or what she fears. Why should we care what happens to these people if we don't even know them? We don't need to know their backstories and deepest darkest secrets, but something to make them more relatable and human (well, as much as a werewolf can). As they stand right now, Sam and Gabby are cardboard characters. She's the hero that is thrust into a new magical world and he's the old wise guy who will serve as her mentor. I've read this story before, everyone has.
Another issue is that turned me off of this book was the lack of world building. The few fantasy elements we are given are more thrown at us than woven into the plot. It's not believable, it doesn't feel real. It's going to be hard to get into the story later if you don't find yourself believing it at the very beginning. People read so that they can escape into a new fantastical world, so if your story isn't realistic, what's the point? The whole thing about Gabby being able to sense everyone around her is really cool, but it doesn't feel like something that fits into the universe. It draws attention to the fact that the book is, well, a fantasy book. Not here for that.
So sorry, Hope(less) I don't think I'll keep going with this story (except for the four chapters I have I guess, I mean I already have them so). If you do want to check this story out, however, you can find Hope(less) on Amazon or read up on more of Melissa's writing at melissahaag.com.
Comments
Post a Comment